Let's talk about gears....

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How are you doing? Is your baseline stress? Mine is!

I always tell this story about how I was in high school that my internal monologue was just different levels of screaming and I sort of feel that it's heading back there. 

My day has started off pretty rough, it started off with getting out of bed with how it usually does. It was exceptionally easy to try to rationalize staying in the warm embrace of my best friend bed. I've been struggling with exhaustion recently so the sheer weight of getting up felt nearly impossible. And then my cat puked 2-3 times on the carpet and then they broke one of our statues and then the internet broke and then my computer decided it wasn't having a good time and I had to quickly improvise because I got booted from my Zoom meeting with my group but this was the only hour we were all able to meet this week. Anyways, it was a bad time.

Which brings me to gears. Everyone is a gear and before you say "Now Ellie, I don't need ANOTHER analogy..." Hear me out. You start out as a raw lump of metal. You can be made into ANYTHING and we all turn into gears. We get sent to a factory of gears for them to make us into gears. Now gears are always in contact with other gears; some gears you mesh well with, some you do not, some move away from your gear span and come back into your gear span later. Eventually though, all gears get worn down, they get ground down, they get nicked, or cracked. They get tossed into the bin and eventually will be melted back down and repeat the whole process. We're all gears.

But what are we propelling? What's the end? What are we doing?

We're all just cogs in a murder machine. (Please don't copyright me, I'm poor.)

-Ellie

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